Q: My husband has a daughter with his ex who is 4 yrs old. The ex just got engaged. She knew the guy for a year and we believe he is now currently living with them. Sometimes the ex needs to work on the weekends. My husband found out that Saturday his ex new fiance watched their 4 yr old while she worked from the morning to afternoon. My husband is very upset because he said he doesnt want any man watching his daughter. But his ex defends it saying that he is going to be their daughters new step dad and it doesnt make sense to pay for a babysitter. My husband tells his ex he rather watch their daughter but they live almost 2 hrs away by train and my husband doesnt want to travel so early in the morning to pick her up and his ex doesnt want to travel so early in the morning to drop her off. My question is: can my husband prevent his ex new fiance from watching their daughter or does he need to learn to accept it?
A: It’s not so much that the fiance can’t babysit – the greater issue is whether the child is better off with your husband versus with the fiance. In this instance, I’d suggest filing a modification petition stating that if the mother otherwise has parenting time, but needs to work or otherwise cannot care for the child for an extended period (say 5 or more hours), then the father should have “right of 1st refusal” before the mother utilizes any other childcare provider fiance or anyone else). Schedule a consult with a Bronx Child Custody attorney for a full assessment.