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June 2017 Archives

How do I divorce when I have recently moved to a new state and do not yet meet the residency requirements?

Q: I have recently moved from NJ to NY with my wife. While the marriage has been deteriorating, it has recently taken a turn for the worse and I want to divorce as quickly as possible.
We have no children and do not own a home, so it should be relatively hassle free, but she refuses to get a divorce or even a separation. Often when I try to walk away from an argument, she will stand in front of my car, get in the bed of my truck, threaten to cancel my debit and credit card if I leave, etc. I am trying to get out of this situation as quickly as possible, but I am unsure if I can file for divorce in NJ where we lived for three years or if I have to wait until I can file in NY. Also, what is the process when she refuses to sign papers? 

Child Support Violation filed by Ex for daycare receipts?

Q: My ex filed a child support violation on me for day care receipts of my child. According to court orders she was to give me child support day care receipts every month, but she delayed and gave me three months receipts together. I do not have that much savings and I could not pay. Now she has filed for a violation of What should I do? 

Is rent expense should be considered into child support?

Q: I have child support case going on. When i opened it I asked the judge to consider my rent expense because I rent the whole apartment alone just to provide safe living environment for my daughter.The rent amount takes up 75% of my income. The judge said it is irrelevant. Should I do audit for the child support case?

Can a father after being absent in my special needs Childs life for five years get any visitation?can he stop me from relocating?

Q: My sons father has been absent in my sons life since we left he's abusive home in 2012 "five years ago"he's a cop so child support has been active since then"he use to be verbally abusive with both of us "we were given joint custody in 2014 and I was given the ok to re locate to Florida " which I did just for a year "he was given my phone number to keep in contact "well I never saw him again " I lived a few blocks away from him and he never once wanted to see my child " I spoke to he's family members and friends and they use to tell me that he was not interested in making no relationship with my son "I have evidence of this messages "five years later I remarried had a child and in the middle of relocating "my husband has a better job opportunity in Florida "my son is special needs and the school he's going to in Florida have a model for children with a seizure disorder and autism "now my sons father summons me to court "violation of petition in 2014 he's lying in court stating that I never showed him our son but yet he found me to summons me"can I re locate on the basis of my child's. Best interest? Can he get any visitation "should I put an Oder of relocating?

Can a credit be applied to child support arrears from money paid outside the agreement?

Q: My daughter is now 21 & even though I am still in arrears I pay support every week more than my order to try & make a dent in what I owe. My daughter is a college student & I have been paying her rent on the side for about 2 years, Even though I make steady payments + my daughter's rent my accounts have been wiped out & I can't keep getting wiped out & having no money for myself to live. Is there any way the rent payments for my daughter can be applied to my support arrears? I can prove payments that are paid out of my bank account monthly.

What can I do if the mother of my child does not allow me to take my child on vacation?

Q: I am not married to the mother of my child however I would like to take my son on vacation and she is telling me that she's not going to give me permission to travel. I have gone on vacation with my son every year but because I want to take him to Puerto Rico so he can meet my family, and she telling me I can't take him

What is the reason for my court appearance as the Plaintiff in my uncontested divorce?

Q: In October 2016 I hired an attorney to file for uncontested divorce on the grounds of irretrievable breakdown. All documents and fees were promptly filed in the aforementioned date. My spouse was served about 2 to 3 months later. A date has been set for July 2017 to appear in court. All matters have been addressed including a custody order made in June 2016 in family court after a trial which lasted almost three years. I was under the impression that an uncontested divorce does not require a court appearance.

Hi.i have a restraining order against my husband out of weschester county!

Q: He has given to court and police phony address in the past police could not find him there but nobody charged him with violation!!? Yesterday he sent my lawyer a email along with attached copy of the mail to me. I can't reach my lawyer to ask him he ls on vacation. Did he commit any restraint order violations by sending the email to my e mail address. Telling my lawyer that tell her this and that. Order that I have specifically says no electronic communication. Should I file a complaint by myself?? Pls advise. Thanks.

Retiring from nys have a dro from xwife was married for 6yrs. Can my current wife of 20 yrs b my beneficiary?

Q: My wife and I want to take the retiring plan of if i passed away she would continue to get my retirement after my death. Can I do that even tho I have a xwife of 6 yrs. also my xwife owes me years of back child support whst can I do to not have her get my retirement due to the monies she owes me? Thank you in advance

What can I do not to let my xwife get any of my retirement ?

Q: I was married to my wife for 5/6 years over 20 years ago. In our divorce decree since she was the custodial parent they gave her a portion on my pension. 6 months after the divorce I became the custodial parent and my kids have been living with me for approx 20 years. The judge ordered her to pay me child support in which she is in arrears. She owes me a substantial amount of money. She just won't pay it. She now lives out of state. Is there a way I can go to court to not have her collect a portion of my retirement due to she owes me so much money. I just want this done. I don't care if I have to drop the child support and call it a wash I just want her to not be able to get any of my pension. Thank you

I owe over $120,000 in child support and I can't relax. How much time am I facing in New York State?

Q: I'm homeless practicing sobriety and honestly not able to live with this hindering me. I'm unable to find the peace of mind nor the happiness required to live for this reality I am aware of.
I do want to be responsible yet I refuse to find myself in a situation where I have to put my possessions in somebodies else's name because of my irresponsible behavior so please let me know

Residential custody?

Q: My son's mother is relocating to Florida and my son wishes to remain in NY. I am applying for a change in residential custody. Can that be denied to me if she chooses to make her 21 year old the custodian so she can continue to receive child support? Or do my rights supercede her wishes?

Can I change from a referee to a judge after giving consent to have the case heard by the referee ?

Q: I have joint physical custody of my 10 year old son, his mother lost custody because of physical abuse. She had chargers pressed in criminal court for neglect and was given probation.this was 5 years ago. She recently took our son to my mothers home in an attempt to drop him after her scheduled visit instead of bringing him to my home as we had agreed. My mother didn't answer the door so she kicked and stomped my mothers door breaking the locks in front of our son. I filed for full custody and no visitation. His mother countered and filed for custody of our son. I've had 3 court appearances and I feel the referee does not like me. We are scheduled to go to trail in September. I just want a fair chance and don't think I will get one. I have an attorney. He said getting a judge after agreeing to see the referee would be hard. My son doesn't want to love with his mother but he would like to visit her as he has been doing every other weekend. Can I lose custody because this referee doesn't like me?

Custody modification

Q: I need to filed an immediate modification to prevent my ex from relocating my son out of state (Florida) without my consent. The order is in Westchester but she moved to the Bronx 4 years ago. Can I still file this modification in Westchester or do I have to start all over in the Bronx? She never moved the case to the Bronx and kept the support order in Westchester as well.

My daughter was in foster care and adopted get custody of her ?

Q: My daughter was in foster care and then adopted but my ACS workers didn't help me and they were fired for other reasons now it's been 5 years I'm clean and stable and I want to try to fight to get custody of her can I do I even have a chance to win

When my daughter's at college in a few months,hundreds of miles upstate, can local or college police be asked to protect her?

Q: My 18 year old daughter had an order of protection from her abusive father for about a year and a half, until February of this year. Due to a subsequent Order to Show Cause, her father now has to stay away from certain events such as her prom and graduation. She's now afraid that in September he'll drive several hundred miles upstate to terrorize her at her college. Without a full order of protection from the Westchester family court, will we be able to get protection from local or college police, since she'll be living there 10 months out of the year?

What happens if I accept an order of protection without admitting guilt?

Q: My husband hand an order of protection to get me out of the house and move his girlfried in but I have no physical proof he has a girlfriend. Just pictures of the house appraisal that there is a double bed in the house which was never there before.

How do I go about getting my license for work if I owe child support which I am now paying?

Q: I have a job and they want to promote me. In order for me to move up I need my license. I have been paying my child support since I started working. I never had a license before.

Another Lesson about going with a "Cheap Lawyer"

It's tempting - I get it. One lawyer says he'll handle your case for a few hundred dollars - or charge per court appearance. Another lawyer's retainer is several thousand up-front. Since you don't know what you're getting, and money is tight, you rationalize to yourself that you'll be o.k. with the cheaper lawyer. After all, he seems like a nice guy, seems like he's been doing this awhile - what could go wrong?
I had a child support case in court recently where the Father retained a cheap attorney. The guy is over-loaded with cases, every single time the case is on in court, he always has multiple other cases. He appears disheveled and doesn't appear like he remembers the case. He even showed up on our last court date & called out his client's name even though his client was sitting nearby - indicating he had forgotten who his own client was!
Suffice it to say, this "cheap attorney" cancelled 1 of the court dates at the last minute - costing both my client & his own client a day off from work. On 2 other court dates he showed up to court approximately 30 minutes late each time - the last time the case was marked for a 10am time-certain trial & he showed up at 10:25 by his own admission. He didn't even bother to apologize to the Judge - apparently his sloppy reputation preceded him.
He tried "negotiating" a settlement with me. His negotiating tact: "Will you client agree to reduce any of the support amount?" When I said "no," he meekly replied "ok" and walked off to his client to "break him the bad news."
This "cheap attorney" did absolutely nothing for his client - except of course to cost him at least $2,000 (since he charged a flat-fee of $500 per appearance) as well as several days off his personal leave balance. Because of his intransigence and unprofessionalism, I had refused to engage in any settlement negotiation and got everything my client deserved.
Thus, while it may be tempting to go with a cheaper attorney, you also have to consider whether that attorney will actually end up costing you money.
Here's an analogy: Say you want to buy a car. You have a choice between buying a new car with an excellent performance rating. Or you could buy a used car, where you'll need to spend alot of time and money taking it constantly back to the repair shop. Which do you choose?
Well, if you literally can't afford the new car, that's one thing. But if you rationalize that "maybe you'll be ok with the used one" that's another. Point is that you may end up worse off with the used car - after factoring in your precious time & money (not to mention aggravation) - than with the new one.
Lawyers are like cars - there are used ones out there and new ones. Amongst the new ones, there are quite capable cars (Fords, Nissans, etc.), there are luxury cars (Lexus, BMW, etc) and there are certainly elite cars (Lamborghini, Ferrari, etc). If you make 6-figures, or close to it, you can - and should - afford a Lexus attorney. Otherwise, you may be stuck on the highway cursing at the Heavens that you made a bad choice later on! 

How often can the primary parent take the noncustodial parent to court to request more support.? At what age does payment end?

Q: Under what circumstances can the primary parent request additional support? Is it every 2 yrs that they can ask for more money? Doe child support ends at the age of 18 or 21?

What happens with visitation when NCP moves out of state?

Q: My ex has visitation alternating weekends Saturday to Sunday. We currently have joint custody with primary physical custody to me. I just found out through another person that next year my ex will be moving to Florida. We live in Bronx, ny. What will happen as far as the visitation schedule. My daughter will be 8 at that time and she has never been away from me for more than two nights. I have raised her alone her whole life and he just got visitation in 2016. She is way too young to be traveling to Florida and staying the whole summer. This will severely affect her. What visitation will he get?

I have been legally married for 10 years but, my first child with my spouse is 14 years old. I would like to know if I can get?

Q: If I can get alimony? My husband wants to have 4 dogs we currently have 3 I totally disagree with one more dog. I am feed up with this situation I want to get a divorce. My children are not happy he is an abusive controlling freak. My oldest child is constantly asking me to get a divorce because he cannot stand his own father. He is currently making $570 a week but, soon at around January he will be making $950. Should I wait until then to file for divorce and child support. Pls help tx

Can my ex-husband request changes to the child support and visitation rights if we separate again (he recently moved back in)?

Q: My ex-husband moved back in 1 year after the final divorce decree was signed. We reconciled and moved in and I am trying to understand if his rights to the children and child support change if he lives with us for 3 months, 6 months, 2 years or more. I don't plan to remarry, so would like to understand his his rights as well as mine if we just live as partners without legally being married. Can he request changes to his visitation rights, if God forbid we separate again based on being in the kids life on a daily basis? Or does the original agreement still stand?

What should I expect at a Preliminary Proceeding?

Q: I recently filed a petition to request a Modification for the Courts to create schedule for my Child's Father. I have Sole Custody and he has reasonable visitation, but he doesn't schedule his visits with me he just shows up at my house. do the courts normally issue a temporary visitation schedule until the hearing?

What is considered proper sleeping arrangements for overnight visits?

Q: My ex gets alternatng weekend Saturday to Sunday for parenting time. This is without a court order. He now has petitioned for visitation since he wants thurs to sun. My daughter who is almost 8 years old tells me that her, my ex and his girlfriend sleep in the same bed when she sleeps there. Is this acceptable sleeping arrangements?

My EX husband Petitioned for downward modification and then withdrew his case. Can he resubmit his petition?

Q: My ex lost his job and filed for downward modification...he then withdrew the petition without letting me know nor did the court alert me. Can I claim damages?

I have missed court dates due to random hospital visits. Does Bronx Family Court verify that these documents are true or not?

Q: my lawyer is a pain regarding medical documentation she claims is necessary for family court. i dont have any reason to lie but going back to the hospital to obtain that information isn't always easy or fast. i dont know how the court even verifies that i was there because they arent allowed access to my information (so i'm guessing). Can they verify the information i give them I.E- discharge papers or papers describing my ailment(s)

What law states that the financial terms of a divorce must be governed by Domestic Relations Law?

Q: If a marriage has all the exact characteristics of a partnership, what law says it must be governed by Domestic Relations Law rather than NY Partnership Law?

Can my wife disappeared 10 years then go to dominican republic and get a divorce without me know anything?

Q: Got marry in 2003 wife disappearedin 2005 in 2015 she got a divorce in dominican repliblic and in 2017 she gave me a divorce decree from dominican republic.

Can the judge in my divorce case change the family court custody order and give my ex custody?

Q: June 2016 my ex-wife consented to my having physical custody with joint legal custody wherein I have final decision making authority. October 2016 I filed for uncontested divorce. July 2017 is the date for a hearing before the judge. My ex keeps telling our oldest daughter to tell teachers and staff at her school 

Can I modify visitation and can my ex have my relocation turned over?

Q: My ex and I split up when our kids were 4 & 1.5... we went through the courts for support and custody. I wanted to move to get married so before the judge my ex allowed myself and the kids to move in return for less support money....jump ahead 5 years, My kids and I moved far away 5 years ago, I am remarried, we have a 2 year old older two kids are in a great school system and are excelling in school and sports. I take them to see their dad almost once a month plus has gotten to the point that their dad thinks it's ok for them to miss school for him which for me in unacceptable...they are now 6 and 9. They become hysterical when they need to go visit stating they are scared of him and such. Our parenting plan states he gets them 1/2 summer but he says he gets them all summer. Can I modify visitations because it is interfering with their school? Can I shorten their summer trips because they compete in competitive sports. They do not want to go anymore for as long or as much as they do. Can their father turn around and change his mind about the initial relocation agreement signed and approved 4 years ago? Would a judge do that?

I have being going to court for,over 6 months now. for custody for my son. My son mother did not show up on for the first

Q: She showed up all the rest of time but didn't show up this time. The court ordered a warrant for her. I haven't been able to get visitation since. What happen now.

How do i file for a poor man divorce in nyc?

Q: Ive been seperated from my wife for over 5 years. We have 4 children together in which 3 of them still resides with me..they are also minors... Their mother has been living in georgia for 3 years now. Ive had the kids in my care for about 5 years. Im also currently on welfare and public assistance. 

If my ex refuses to split college expenses in spite of the divorce agreement, would I go to family court or support court?

Q: My ex is currently paying child support, but he insisted during the divorce that child support should not represent a credit toward college expenses. Now that our daughter has come back to me after neighbors called the police, he no longer likes the clause that he himself insisted on. College is just a couple of months away so should I request assistance from support court or family court?

How old does a child need to be to travel alone?

Q: My sons father has visitation rights every other weekend. I was recently informed that he sends my 10 year old son to travel alone a few blocks. I dont agree with my son walking alone without supervision. neither one of us has custody of him but my son has been with me since he was born. I've never sent him to travel alone so for this to be happening I'm concerned. What can I do about this?

Last year I agreed to joint legal custody but now I regret it. How to change to sole custody?

Q: Last year my ex took me to court for custody. He wanted joint custody. He was given a visitation schedule and the judge had told us to start a new, so I agreed to joint custody with primary physical custody to me. This past year has been a nightmare though. He is highly disrespectful towards me when I dont agree with him. He calls me numerous profanities. I tell him not to speak to me like that and he continues. There has been nothing for us to make decisions on. When the court order was created everything had been set up already. Her religion, her health insurance, her school and her after school program. He wants a say in all of those things but everything was already set up before he was given joint legal and our daughter is 7 years old. He lives in yonkers and I live in the bronx. He nitpicks on everything. He criticizes the way I do her hair, the clothes I put her in when she visits him. How can I get sole custody?

When do things become inappropriate?

Q: Hello, i am currently a mother of a soon to be 11 year old boy. I am no longer together with my sons father as of 7 years ago now. He's been very manipulative throughout the 7 years I've been in my new relationship. He threatened me non stop for moving on, and eventually went to court for visition rights to take the time my son spends with his stepfather away. This is what he told me out of his mouth. the court granted him every single right I have even if he hasn't been much involved in my son's life but now my son's life has been readjusted because of him. What he does during my son's visits is talk real bad about me. He bans my son from talking to me after 7pm whenever he gets him. My son always cries to go he told my child that he came out premature because I smoke when in reality I suffer from premature labora due to family history. My son is always crying. What can I do? I don't want to believe this is ok and that my son has to suffer and cry and hear inappropriate things about me he comes back angry and sad all the time. What can I do?

When a petition is dismissed by the judge, do all final and temporary orders get dismissed as well?

Q: In October 2016, my ex did not show up to a hearing for custody/visitation and the judge dismissed the petition since he filed. In july 2016 we had two court orders made : a final order of joint legal custody and a temporary order for visitation. When the petition was dismissed I was told it was as if he never filed and he would have to refile. My question is, were both orders dismissed or just the temporary one. If they were both made under the same petition and the petition wad dismissed do I still need to follow it.

Will a written agreement between my ex and I stating we agree to keep romantic partners away from child be admissible in court?

Q: Hello, can my ex and I establish a written agreement for both parties to keep any new partners away from our child, also can this agreement be admissible in court if the agreement is broken? I want to establish this written agreement for safety concerns. My daughter is a non-verbal two and a half year old with PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified). This is "atypical autism." Her father is already exposing her to women and I am fearful for my child's safety and well being. If my child is abused or neglected by his new partner, my child cannot express that to me.

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